How to Start Conversation With Girl on Instagram

By: Ellen Bartolino

Last Updated on June 15, 2023 by Ellen Bartolino

Best Way to Start a Conversation with a Girl on Instagram: Top Texting Techniques and Tips to Get Her Chatting

In the digital age, Instagram has become a popular platform for communication, especially when it comes to sparking a conversation with a girl. However, initiating a conversation on Instagram can be a daunting task for many. You might be wondering how to break the ice without coming off as creepy or desperate. Well, you’re not alone in this.

According to data from We Are Social, only 0.1% of Instagram users are unique to the platform. A large number of users use it alongside other social media platforms such as Facebook (82.9%), YouTube (75.5%) and TikTok (52.2%). This means that the girl you’re interested in probably has a lot of other messages to sift through, making it even more crucial for you to stand out.

But don’t worry, this guide is here to help you with how to start a conversation with girl on Instagram you’ve been eyeing. We’ll provide you with practical tips and strategies to not only initiate a conversation but also keep it going. So, let’s dive in.

Understanding Instagram Etiquette (Profile)

Instagram is more than just a platform for sharing photos and videos. It’s a social network where you can connect with people from all over the world, including that girl you’ve been eyeing. But before you slide into her DMs, it’s important to understand Instagram etiquette.

Respecting Personal Boundaries

First and foremost, respect her personal boundaries. Instagram is a public platform, but that doesn’t mean everyone is open to receiving messages from strangers. If her profile is private, it’s a clear sign that she values her privacy. Don’t try to bypass this by following her just to send a message. It’s respectful to acknowledge her privacy settings and respect her space.

Importance of Being Genuine and Authentic

When you do reach out, be genuine and authentic. Avoid using pick-up lines or clichéd compliments. Instead, take the time to look through her profile and find something specific you can comment on. Maybe she has a photo from a hike that you’ve also done, or she’s wearing a shirt from a band you love. Personalized messages show that you’ve taken an interest in her, not just her looks.

According to a 2023 statistic, Tinder use is far more common among younger adults than among older Americans: 79% of online dating users under 30 say they have used the platform, compared with 44% of users ages 30 to 49, 17% of users 50 to 64 and just 1% of those 65 and older. Tinder is the top online dating platform among users under 50. This shows that more and more people are turning to online platforms to make connections, so understanding the etiquette is crucial.

Remember, the goal is not to impress her with your smooth talking. It’s to start a genuine conversation and make a real connection. So, don’t act desperate. Be patient and give her time to respond. If she’s interested, she will.

In the next section, we’ll discuss how to craft the perfect first message. So, stay tuned!

Crafting the Initial Message (DM)

Crafting the Initial Message (DM)

Starting a conversation with a girl on Instagram can be a daunting task, especially if you’re not sure what to say. But don’t worry, we’ve got you covered. Here are some tips on how to craft the perfect initial message.

Best ways to message girls on Instagram

The first message you send to a girl on Instagram can make or break your chances of getting a response. So, it’s important to get it right. Here are some tips:

  1. Be genuine: Avoid using cheesy pick-up lines or generic compliments. Instead, try to make your message personal and genuine. Show her that you’ve taken the time to look at her profile and that you’re interested in getting to know her.
  2. Ask open-ended questions: Instead of just saying “hi” or “hey”, try asking an open-ended question. This will give her something to respond to and will help to keep the conversation flowing.
  3. Use humor: A little humor can go a long way in breaking the ice. If you can make her laugh, you’re already one step ahead.

Remember, the goal of the first message is to start a conversation, not to ask her out or propose marriage. Keep it light and fun.

Ensuring a high chance of getting a response

Even if you send the perfect first message, there’s no guarantee that she’ll respond. However, there are a few things you can do to increase your chances:

  1. Timing is everything: Try to message her when she’s likely to be online. If you notice that she often posts or comments at a certain time of day, that might be a good time to send your message.
  2. Don’t be pushy: If she doesn’t respond right away, don’t send a bunch of follow-up messages. Give her some time to respond. If she’s interested, she’ll get back to you.
  3. Be patient: Remember, she’s probably getting a lot of messages from other guys as well. Don’t get discouraged if she doesn’t respond right away.

Remember, starting a conversation with a girl on Instagram is just like starting a conversation in real life. Be respectful, be genuine, and be patient. And most importantly, be yourself.

Initiating the Conversation (Chat)

Starting a conversation with a girl on Instagram can feel like a daunting task. You might be worried about saying the wrong thing, or simply being ignored. But don’t worry, we’ve got you covered. In this section, we’ll guide you through the process of initiating a conversation, making it engaging, and increasing your chances of getting a response.

Responding to Stories

One of the easiest and most effective ways to initiate a conversation is by responding to her stories. This is a casual and non-intrusive way to start a chat. When you see a story that resonates with you or sparks you

Responding to Stories

r interest, don’t hesitate to send her a DM. Make your message personal and relevant to the story. For instance, if she posts a story about her favorite book, you could respond with something like, “I love that book too! What did you think of the ending?” This shows that you share a common interest and opens up a topic for further discussion.

Using Memes or Relevant Content

Humor can be a great ice breaker. If you come across a meme or a piece of content that you think she might find amusing or interesting, feel free to share it with her. Just make sure it’s appropriate and aligns with her sense of humor or interests. Remember, the goal is to make her smile and initiate a fun conversation, not to offend her or make her uncomfortable.

Commenting on Posts

Another effective way to initiate a conversation is by commenting on her posts. This shows that you’re interested in her and what she’s sharing. Try to make your comments thoughtful and engaging. Instead of simply saying “Nice pic,” you could say something like, “The sunset in this picture is stunning! Is this your favorite spot in the city?” This kind of comment is more likely to get a response and start a conversation.

Direct Messaging

Finally, there’s the direct approach – sending her a text via Direct Message. This can be a bit more intimidating, but it’s also the most straightforward way to start a conversation. When crafting your first message, keep it light, personal, and interesting. Avoid generic messages like “Hey” or “What’s up?” Instead, mention something specific from her profile that caught your attention, or ask a question about one of her posts. This shows that you’ve taken the time to learn about her and are genuinely interested in getting to know her better.

Remember, the key to initiating a successful conversation on Instagram is to be genuine, respectful, and engaging. Show interest in her as a person, not just as a profile on a screen. And most importantly, have fun with it! After all, Instagram is a social platform, so don’t be afraid to be social and start a conversation.

Direct Approach to Talk to a Girl on Instagram (Tips to Get Her Chatting)

Initiating the Conversation

So, you’ve found a girl on Instagram who caught your eye, and now you’re wondering how to make the first move. Well, you’re in the right place! The first thing you need to remember is to be genuine and respectful. Remember, you’re not the only one who’s trying to get her attention, so your approach needs to stand out.

One of the best ways to initiate a conversation is by engaging with her posts. If she posts a picture of a delicious meal, you could send a DM asking where the food is from. If she posts a beach picture, ask about her vacation. Or, if she posts a cute selfie, don’t hesitate to give her a compliment. This approach not only shows that you’re interested in her life but also opens up a conversation in a non-threatening way.

Remember that first message you send is crucial. It sets the tone for the rest of the conversation. So, make sure it’s thoughtful and relevant.

Initiating the Conversation

Suggesting a Meetup

Once you’ve established a good rapport with her, you might want to take things to the next level. This could mean suggesting a meetup. But remember, timing is everything. You don’t want to rush this step. Wait until you’ve had a few good conversations before suggesting a meetup. And when you do, make sure it’s in a public place where she’ll feel safe.

Asking Her Out

Finally, if all goes well and you feel a connection, you might decide to ask her out on a date. This is a big step, so it’s important to be direct but respectful. Remember, it’s okay if she says no. The important thing is that you took the chance and put yourself out there.

As someone who was initially hesitant about online dating, I decided to give it a shot and started by engaging with women on Instagram. I found that responding to their stories with genuine interest and humor was a great way to initiate a conversation. Over time, I was able to build a connection and even transition the conversation offline.

Remember, every interaction is a learning experience. So even if things don’t go as planned, don’t be discouraged. Keep trying, keep learning, and keep improving your approach. Good luck!

Expanding the Conversation (Reply)

You’ve initiated the conversation, and she’s responded. Great! But now what? How do you keep the conversation going and make it more meaningful? Here are some tips to help you expand the conversation.

Engaging with Recent Posts

One of the best ways to continue the conversation is by engaging with her recent posts. Show her that you’re interested in her life and what she shares on Instagram. For instance, if she posts a picture of a book she’s reading, you could ask her about her favorite part or how she finds the author’s writing style. Remember, the goal is to show genuine interest, not just to keep the conversation going.

Expanding the Conversation Topics

Another effective way to keep the conversation flowing is by expanding the conversation topics. If you’ve been talking about her recent vacation, you could transition to talking about travel in general. Ask her about her dream destinations or her most memorable travel experiences. This not only keeps the conversation interesting but also helps you learn more about her.

Showing Genuine Interest

Lastly, always show genuine interest. Whether you’re commenting on her posts or responding to her stories, make sure your responses are thoughtful and show that you’re paying attention. This could be as simple as complimenting her on her photography skills or asking more about the story behind a photo. Remember, genuine interest goes a long way in building a connection.

Remember, the key to a great conversation is not just about what you say, but also how you say it. Keep the conversation light and fun, and don’t be afraid to add a touch of humor. After all, who doesn’t enjoy a good laugh?

Stay tuned for more tips on how to navigate the world of Instagram dating. In the next section, we’ll discuss how to suggest a meetup and ask her out. So, keep reading!

Transitioning from DM to Date (Text)

You’ve been texting a girl on Instagram, and things are going well. Now, you’re ready to take the next step: transitioning from the digital world to the real one. But how do you go from DM to date without losing momentum or making things awkward? Let’s explore some strategies and conversation examples to help you navigate this exciting transition.

From Online to Offline

From Online to Offline

The transition from DM to date can feel like a big leap, but it doesn’t have to be. Start by suggesting a casual meet-up based on shared interests. For example, if you both love coffee, suggest a visit to a new coffee shop in town. Keep the tone light and fun, just like your online interactions. Remember, the goal is to get to know each other better, not to put pressure on either of you.

Conversation Examples

When it comes to texting a girl, it’s all about keeping the conversation flowing. Here’s an example of how you might transition from online to offline:

You: “I saw a post about a new art exhibit downtown. It reminded me of those cool art posts you share. Would you be interested in checking it out together?”

Her: “That sounds like fun! I’d love to.”

Remember, the key is to suggest activities that align with her interests. This shows that you’ve been paying attention to her posts and that you value her hobbies and passions.

As a personal note, I remember when I first started using Instagram to connect with people. I was interested in a girl who shared a lot of food-related content. I started by tagging her in funny food-related memes and commenting on her posts. This led to us exchanging messages and eventually meeting up for a food festival in our city. It was a great experience that started with a simple online interaction.

Transitioning from online to offline can be a thrilling step in your relationship. By keeping the conversation engaging, showing genuine interest, and suggesting activities based on shared interests, you can smoothly transition from DM to date. Remember, every great relationship starts with a single conversation, so don’t be afraid to take that next step.

What to Do if She Doesn’t Respond (Message)

You’ve sent her a message, but she hasn’t responded. It’s a situation we’ve all been in, and it can be frustrating. But don’t worry, there are ways to handle this.

Understanding and Respecting Her Decision

First and foremost, it’s important to understand that everyone has their own reasons for not responding. She might be busy, she might not have seen your message, or she might simply not be interested. It’s crucial to respect her decision and not take it personally. Remember, everyone has the right to choose who they want to interact with.

Focusing on Self-Improvement

Instead of dwelling on the lack of response, use this time to focus on self-improvement. This could mean working on your conversation skills, expanding your interests, or even improving your Instagram profile. By focusing on becoming the best version of yourself, you’ll not only increase your chances of getting a response in the future, but you’ll also become more confident and attractive as a person.

Remember, it’s not about winning over every girl you message. It’s about finding the right person who appreciates you for who you are. So, don’t get discouraged if she doesn’t respond. Keep improving, keep messaging, and eventually, you’ll find the right person.


You’ve made it to the end of this comprehensive guide on how to start a conversation with a girl on Instagram. It’s been a journey, hasn’t it? But remember, the journey is just as important as the destination.

Recap of Key Points

Let’s do a quick recap of what we’ve covered:

  1. Starting the Conversation: We’ve learned that the best way to start a conversation is by commenting on her posts or replying to her stories. This shows that you’re interested in her content and not just her looks.
  2. Keeping the Conversation Going: We’ve discussed the importance of asking open-ended questions, showing genuine interest, and keeping the conversation light and fun.
  3. Dealing with No Response: If she doesn’t respond, it’s crucial to respect her decision and focus on self-improvement. Remember, it’s not a reflection of your worth.
  4. Taking it to the Next Level: If the conversation is going well, we’ve learned how to smoothly transition it from Instagram to a more personal platform like texting or a phone call.

Encouragement for the Reader

Now, it’s your turn to put these tips into action. Remember, starting a conversation with a girl on Instagram doesn’t have to be nerve-wracking. It’s all about being genuine, respectful, and showing interest in her as a person.

And don’t forget, even if things don’t go as planned, it’s not the end of the world. Each conversation is a learning experience that brings you one step closer to becoming a master conversationalist.

As per the 2023 Instagram Trend Report, understanding the trends and interests of your target demographic can significantly improve your chances of starting and maintaining meaningful conversations. So, keep learning, keep improving, and most importantly, keep conversing!

Remember, every expert was once a beginner. So, don’t be disheartened if things don’t go as planned. Keep trying, keep learning, and soon, you’ll be the one giving expert advice on how to start a conversation with a girl on Instagram.

That’s it, folks! You’re now equipped with all the tools you need to start a conversation with a girl on Instagram. So, go out there, start chatting, and remember to have fun! After all, Instagram is a social platform, so be social and enjoy the process. Good luck!

How do I start a conversation with a girl on Instagram?


How do I start a conversation with a girl on Instagram?

Take a look at her posts and find something that you genuinely like or find interesting. Then, send her a message related to that and ask her a question about it. For example, if she posts a lot about food, you could ask her about a recipe she recently shared.

What’s the best way to start a conversation with a girl on Instagram?

It’s important to approach a girl on Instagram with confidence but not too much neediness. One good way to start the conversation is to compliment her on something specific, like her style or a photo she posted. Then, follow up with a question or comment related to that.

Can I just like a girl’s photo instead of messaging her?

You can, but it doesn’t give you the same opportunity to start a conversation and get to know her. Liking a photo may not get her attention in the same way sending a message could.

How can I get her chatting once we’ve started the conversation?

Ask questions and show interest in what she has to say. Don’t just talk about yourself or dominate the conversation. It’s important to give her a chance to share her thoughts and feelings too.

What are some expert tips to continue the conversation?

Ask open-ended questions that can’t be answered with just a yes or no. Use humor when appropriate, and share some personal stories or experiences to make the conversation more engaging.

How can I get to know a girl better through Instagram?

Pay attention to what she posts and shares, and ask her questions about those things. You can also share your own interests and hobbies to find common ground to bond over.

Should I wait for her to message me back?

It’s okay to wait a little bit for a response, but don’t be too pushy or creepy. If you don’t get a reply after a few days, it’s probably safe to assume she’s not interested and move on.

Is it okay to text a girl I’ve never met in person before?

It’s okay, but be respectful and mindful of her boundaries. Start the conversation off slowly and see how she responds before diving into anything too flirty or personal.

Author Bio

Ellen Bartolino

With a wealth of experience as an author and communication specialist, Ellen has honed her skills in the realm of Instagram. Her in-depth understanding of the platform allows her to create engaging and effective content that resonates with both businesses and individuals.

Reach your audience

With over 300 million users on Instagram, there is no better way to promote yourself, your creative projects, or your business than on the extremely popular platform. The only problem is, how can you ensure that your voice is heard through all the noise?